I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
