hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
