3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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