I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
