Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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