It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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