how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize