Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Man, jail baloney is awful.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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