I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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