hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize