you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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