where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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