as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
