This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
