i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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