I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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