Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
