We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
