Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
So much Jack, so little girl.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
