no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
