I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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