Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
