ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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