i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
