I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
