used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We named our party play list daddy issues
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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