Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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