I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
