marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
