this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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