he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
