Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize