There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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