she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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