I faked an abortion last night.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
