That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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