Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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