He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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