We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
North Korea, Best Korea!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
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