I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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