he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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