There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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