Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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