YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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