Your tits are I can't wait for
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
