We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
