hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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