I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
