Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
