Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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