I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
